My Religious Beliefs

My Conversion

I used to be blinded. I was a taoist/buddhist due to my upbringing and then became an atheist. But I am blinded no more. I have opened my eyes to the wonders of the world and see the need for a creator behind everything. And that creator is the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

The one true Creator!

While I have to note first, I have 5 religions. Pastafrianism is the one true religion and I primarily worship our creator the Flying Spaghetti Monster. But I also follow the belief held by the Missionary Church of Kopimism that sharing information, including file sharing, is sacred. I also worship the Force, the mysterious force that runs through all life, you could say I am a Jedi wannabe.

One of our most respected clergymen!

In the past few days, I have been further enlightened. It had been a grueling month for me as I was struggling in my spiritual choices, I was considering a fourth religion, and Christianity was my top pick. But in the end, I settled for Mormonism as my fourth religion due to the charisma of Joseph Smith and Scientology as my fifth religion since it is endorsed by Tom Cruise, I mean a celebrity's choices can't be wrong right?

Who would trust those ugly atheists over this handsome man?

I say, put a stop to the religious wars my fellow theists! Don't try to kill each other and compare religions all the time. Know a new religion that's almost as cool as Christianity? Don't feel threatened, feel enlightened! Embrace that religion and place an idol of your new secondary god beside an idol of Jesus! This the life man.

This is my testimony as a man who is happily engaged in 5 religions, and I say the more the merrier! Get your new religions at your closest religious institution today! It's free*!

*Fees may be incurred in the form of requested donations.

My Pity For Atheists

I used to be an atheist, like I said before. It is much to my chagrin that I used to be so sad and deluded. Wake up atheists!

Here's what I think about your moronic fringe group's ideas!

The universe is obviously created by a complex designer that may have existed all along and/or came to being out of nothing, and most importantly it cannot be due to something absurd like the big bang, the universe being created out of nothing? Don't make me laugh! That's impossible! A creator that existed out of nothing due to his omnipotence is much more likely.

I'm not sure why even I couldn't understand such a simple process the last time, this is probably something even three year olds can understand! Shame on you atheists.

Also, that evolution thing? Yeah it's true. But you know what? It was actually guided by the noodly appendages of the Flying Spaghetti Monster! There is no way such complex changes in an organism could be caused by nature, out of nothing, that is simply absurd! It has to be guided by a designer, who is there to guide all of the organisms! Never mind the multiple 'flaws' you find in organisms, the FSM did it because of his sense of humour! It is still much more intelligent than you!

Now, I am also a follower of such other great religions like Mormonism, so I do not discount the fact that Yahweh God could have done that instead, but the FSM is my primary deity.

I pray for your souls and I hope the FSM blesses you with his noodly appendages and lets you into the stripper factory and beer volcano when you die.

Giggling At People Who Claim Atheism Is A Religion

Atheism is a religion! And Christianity is a social and political affiliation! It's not true you say? Why? Because of the various definitions laid out of what "Christianity" is? And because you know that Christianity is a religion because you are able to decipher that from real world knowledge?

Impressive. Apparently, some people can't.

'Atheism is a religion!', they say. 'You are just like us!', they say. How many people think its true? How many people who think its true are atheists or any kind of learned man? I'm guessing the numbers dwindled greatly in the second question.

What constitutes as religion? Religion is the belief in higher powers. It is based purely on faith and belief.

Then what constitutes as atheism? It is the disbelief in any gods. It is not the belief that there are no gods, unlike what many theists would like you to believe. Many atheists are unconverted former-theists who actually believed in imaginary friends like you, but they realised that their friends were imaginary because of evidence or experiences or rationalism of some kind. They would very much have preferred to belief that there are gods, but they can't belief in gods because there are no gods.

Atheism is a wide category, just as religion is. There are various religions, and for atheism, it is even more diverse. A basic analogy would be that someone isn't a stamp collector, his hobby could be anything else that isn't stamp collection. Or someone isn't a socialist, he could be of any political ideology except socialism. For an atheist, he could believe the universe was created by itself, he could believe the universe always existed, he can believe the universe is just a figment of our imagination etc. These all fit into the definition of atheism. All babies are atheists because they don't have understanding of religion and creation, that's the basic concept.

'But they preach about the evils and fallacies of religions, they are like us!' you say? Yeah, Occupy Wall Street is a religion about anti-corporatism, Socialism is a religion about sharing your property with others and the Republican Party is a religion preaching about the greatness of Ronald Reagan.

Atheists preach about the evils and fallacies of religious out of a social and moral obligation, they believe everyone should not waste their time and money in such garbage. It is similar to when Christians preach about joining their ranks, because they don't want others to burn in hell. Christians who preach about the greatness of Yahweh, however, are different from us, because they are not doing it for social good, but for their imaginary friend.

These atheists that do such 'preaching' are 'militant atheists' and/or 'anti-theists', who oppose religion because of it's poisoning of society. It is more of a social movement rather than a religious movement. They preach to have people to leave religion and also to install secularism, a political status where there is a separation of religion from government.

But there are also 'closet atheists' who don't do anything to anyone, they are just atheists and keep to themselves. Then there are 'atheist religions' which are mostly non-theistic religions, that practice common philosophy, this is probably the closest to religion atheism is.

Another thing is, they don't gather frequently for prayer and religious services like theists do. Most atheists educate people just like Occupy Wall Street does, through the internet and peaceful protests. There are no religious connotations, only social well-intentions.

If atheists are a religion, they should receive tax breaks and other benefits enjoyed by organised religions, but why don't they? Because they are not recognised anyway legally by the government.

Atheism is not religion, never was, never will be. I know because I was a former atheist, and now a proud Pastafrian and a Kopimist, and considering third or fourth religion(s), I am happily living as a theist now and I love this life.